my brother has such issues, it really worries me. this christina girl leads him on and he thinks they will get back together because that is what he ...wants sadly. than he snaps, dramatically. now he thinks he can't do anything with his life and is so bored with it he tags, because he says there is nothing else to do. maybe i should let him on my computer. have the sims take up his life.. its some sort of life, i guess
[16 Apr 2009|07:32pm]
me and robert, are no longer together. we arent friends right now.. i said some pretty hurtful things. i was irrational and upset. over the phone break up..
nigga im done with stressin' over what you feel I should prove to you, for what? You don't believe me anyways. So if it would be best, make your choice, in or out of your life. and POOF your wish is my command
[09 Jun 2008|08:02pm]
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My last few weekends. Hanging out with Emma. Beca turns 14. I get in a limo to go to Venice with my cheer hoes. We go right up to the beach and go to this nice restaurant for our banquet. Later on go see Wicked with my mom. Hurricane Harbor with Beca and Mom. Great Grandma Lucy turns 97! Also some random stuff. Boredom in school so why not? haha. I have a interview for Abercrombie Kids on tuesday. I bought my first two shirts from there. They were on sale, 50% off. You know meeeee =). I hate how my body is small and yet my fucking boobs force me into bigger sizes. My and my mom conversation.
me - cause of today perfect world people my size arent supposed to have well um boobs.
mom - you used to complain about not having any when you were younger!
me - yeah that is because I had mosquito bites!
mom - well they are not that now...
me - I know its like the mosquito bites got swollen, now I am just waiting for them to go down.
mom - HAHAHA, well if they get any bigger I am going to be mad!
me - Oh they will, all mosquito bites go away after a while.
Enjoy. Hope everyone had a blast at prom<3
( Here comes the sun )
Hi Dakota, I feel like I have to message you because I need to move on from what has happened in the past. I don't approve of some things that have happened and some actions you have taken but I am sure you probably havent for me either. So I think we should just forgive and forget and move on. I am not saying we have to be friends or anything just 'okay' with one another for our and Roberts sake. I am sure you will understand, Thanks.
[03 Nov 2007|05:09pm]
Sometimes you’ve got to go back down
the road you leave behind.
[13 Oct 2007|11:20am]
Tears of joy? They streamed down while I was just listening to my song. That postive vibe of fresh air I just seemed to encounter, was wonderful.
[Chorus] Hey! Hey! You! You! I don’t like your girlfriend! No way! No way! I think you need a new one Hey! Hey! You! You! Kristina used t be your girlfriend
Hey! Hey! You! You! I know you used to like my bestie No way! No way! No it’s not a secret Hey! Hey! You! You! Kristina used to be a better girlfriend
[Verse 1] You’re so fine Kristina wants you You’re so delicious She thinks about ya all the time You’re so addictive Don’t you know what she could do to make you feel alright? Don’t pretend she thinks you know she's damn precious And Hell Yeah She's the motherfucking princess I can tell you like her too and you know I’m right
[Bridge] She’s like so whatever You could do so much better I think you and Kristina should get back together now And that’s what everyone’s talking about!
[Chorus] Hey! Hey! You! You! I don’t like your girlfriend! No way! No way! I think you need a new one Hey! Hey! You! You! Kristina could be your girlfriend
Hey! Hey! You! You! I know you used to like my bestie No way! No way! No it’s not a secret Hey! Hey! You! You! Kristina used to be a better girlfriend
[Verse 2] I can see the way, I see the way you look at her And even when you look away I know you think of her I know you talk about her all the time again and again So come over here, tell her what she wants to hear Better yet make your girlfriend disappear She doesn't want to hear you say her name ever again (And again and again and again!)
[Bridge] She’s like so whatever You could do so much better I think you and Kristina should get back together now And that’s what everyone’s talking about!
Chorus] Hey! Hey! You! You! I don’t like your girlfriend! No way! No way! I think you need a new one Hey! Hey! You! You! Kristina could be your girlfriend
Hey! Hey! You! You! I know you used to like my bestie No way! No way! No it’s not a secret Hey! Hey! You! You! Kristina used to be a better girlfriend
In a second you’ll be wrapped around her finger Cause she can, cause she can do it better There’s no other So when's it gonna sink in? She’s so stupid What the hell were you thinking?! [repeat]
[Chorus (repeat)]
By: Angelina Loveeee.
[10 May 2007|07:33pm]
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Sorry, I am not trying to build a relationship; I am trying to get over one.
Memories are keeping me going. I was in the shower and i just kept thinking about the old times. For the first time ever i didn't cry. I simply smiled. It was a great feeling. * I don't know where i should go now. I don't know what i should do now. All i know is things have to be looking up. Not down. Sure that day will come and yes it will be the worst but it will pass and i will have to cope with it. * Roxy's Bday soon. Then Matlins. Then soon enough MINNEEE! haha well give it a month or two from theres then it will be mine. Oh yes everyone must see Distrubia. Or else!!!!
Honestly this is way harder than i thought. I see him and think what do i do? How do i act. I only know of one way ..run up to him and give him a huge hug and a kiss. Now what? How do i approach him or anything. How do i bear to talk to him without having my feelings get involved. I still choke up when i see him. I still can't believe i haven't cried in front of him. Because everytime i see him or a realtionship for that matter i get a lil bit teary eyed. I like him so much more than words can explain. It's weird i can be fine all day and as soon as i get home i burst out crying. Like as i am writting this and thinking about it i am getting teary eyed. FUCK MAN. Emotions take the worst of me sometimes. Wow, it's funny how he seems to think that "i can find someone better" or that "i will be able to get over him 2 weeks tops" See the way i look at it, is if i was stressing over it way before it even happened and thinking omg omg omg then how can't he see how badly i care for him. How badly i want to be there for him. How badly i don't want anyone else but him. I know i know there will be others. But for right now i don't want others. No i don't. I haven't even gone one minute without thinking about what happened or talking about it. Not even one fucking minute. I tired it all day. ALL FUCKING DAY. I saw him at nut. We spoke. I guess it helped. But in another way i just want to hold him close and never let go. I saw him at lunch, as soon as i even looked straight i saw a tall sexy person and i go omg! I turn around so fast and my heart is in my stomach. I am nervous and shy and scared and worried and sad. I don't know how to act or feel. After school there we go again all same emotions. I see him, i wouldn't dare come up to him. You never know he may not want to talk or something. He saw me and we walked and talked. I wanted to break down right then and there. But i was trying to be strong. Oh so strong. It is so hard. I can't think of this any longer. I havent been eating at all really. The last time i ate was Breakfast. =/ I just don't feel like it. Everything fucking reminds me of him. It's like the world is punishing me. I still like him a lot a lot a lot. I don't know for how that to go away but time. All i can do is be there for him...as a friend.
Quote: You're so fine I want you [to be] mine You're so delicious I think about you all the time You're so addictive Don't you know What I can do To make you feel alright
Horoscope For Today.
Daily Singles: There's not likely to be much middle ground right now, which means matters of the heart may go gorgeously or could be something of a disaster. Still, even in the latter case, at least you can move on.
OHH really?
From Monica to me: yeah it will take you awhile to finally calm down and stop crying no doubt there. don't stop crying let it out, don't bundle it in so you can become a watermelon. let it out even if you want to be there for him and talk to him he needs to know how you feel about it. you should really let him know how you fell about the whole situation. don't leave it in the dark. you will over come this, its hard no one said it was easy thats why they call them heart breaks or break ups.... the name explains it all. don't worry your a very strong individual.
&& Another thing. He didn't want to hurt me right. Why does he keep saying that or people keep saying that i don't get it. He didn't want to hurt me because he didn't want to cheat because he liked this other girl. He broke up with me because he liked the other girl. If it wasnt for this otehr girl and this liking you mean we would have still been together. Now that doesn't make sense. Well when you start dating, i know you will. It will be like this. (A) Hard to hear (B) Hard to see (c) Hard to realize that she is the "reason" why we aren't together. Well i hope you guys last all of forever, because if she is the reason and if you didn't want to hurt me because you didn't want to cheat on me then you guys better last fucking forever. Or that will hurt me harder than fuck. Actually either way would. I am kinda in shock that today i am crying TONS more than i did yesterday. I think it's because of all i am hearing about. DAMMNN IT FUCK COCK SUCKER MOTHER FUCK PIECE OF SHIT. Mind you, i don't like cussing. That is just how mad and depressed i am over this.
First off i wanna say thank you for everyone who was trying to cheer me up. You all said pretty much the same thing. <3 "You don't need him." "Oh fuck boys." Personally thank you but its fine. I don't wanna think of fuck boys and oh i don't need him, because frankly he was wonderful. We never fought , although one time i did hit him in the balls really hard and he got mad..might i add i still feel bad about it. Yes. i am said it's over but frankly i never thought it would start. Am i happy it did. FUCKK YESSS. Have you seen him?! Ha. Do i think it was supposed to end? No, i don't feel that at all. Apparently he did. But hey i wasn't the one ending things. Whatever it is his choice. Did i see it coming. OHH yeahh. I was stressing for days. I couldn't eat or sleep. I kept putting myself down saying i am not good enough he could do better. Everything you can think of i did or thought about. I am so happy i did it but i don't feel like. Ah how do i explain this. Like you know when you run a mile you feel like you completed it and you feel like you gave it your all and your feel like that was all you could give. Well i feel like i didn't. That it was to soon to be over. That i didn't complete the mile i only did a mear 2/4 of the way not even. One thing is that i don't understand is where did it go wrong. None the less what went wrong. I know it wasn't out of the blue and all but it kinda was in a way. Nothing went wrong just i saw it coming. That is the only way how is isn't out of the blue. Yes he has his reasons. Don't we all. I don't hate him. I know ex's your supposed to hate but i don't hate him. I knew it was coming. I knew it. So maybe that is why i am handeling it so well. I didn't even cry that much...well just off and on a lot. Don't let the smile fool you, i am dying in the inside and breaking down. In a way i am happy its over yes, no stress. In a way i am depressed and sad it is because i still like him a lot! I still care for him and just because its over he is still going to be number 4 on my top people behind all my besties. I still wanna go and cheer him on for his swim meets. I still wanna chat maybe sometimes on AIM. I mean i don't know how long it will take but i don't hate the guy. Do i wish we were still together. Oh fuck yes. I stayed up every night during Spring Break and wished for Robert. Wished for us to stay together for akjdaal;sd some months. I thought a lot more than we had not even two...It would have been btw on Monday. I wished for him to "love" me like no other. No, no not sexual. I just wanted him to look back on me and say yeah i am glad i dated her. She was nice. Not oh her yeah we dated a month and a half ehh no biggy. I wished for girls to back off. I wished more than anything to be ungrounded and that i would get better grades. I wished that he would call me and make me feel good and re-a-sure me thats everything is fine and none the less call me back. I wished for me to stop thinking all the time. I wished and wished and wished and wished like i haven't in my whole life. Wishes do come true. I made one when i laid eyes on Robert..that came true. I made a lot when i was little to get a cat. I got tons. Well i found all these kittens in my backyard. So wishes do come true. But i guess this was out of my hands of wishing. Out of my hands period. It was in his hands. People say "oh if i knew he was going to break up with me i would have done it first". I wouldn't have frankly.. I knew it was coming and he had his reasons. What would mine been, "oh i am beating you to the punch"! No, that is just bitchy and stupid. No offense. I don't really think i would have done anything different. It is just really hard. I am still waiting to wake up and him say "APRIILL FOOLS" That won't happen. Maybe Friday the 13 wont be to bad. I mean how can it get any worse? And as i said that i thought of 456789075863245136895 more ways it could get worse. WOW. I just hope we can be friends, that is all. And if i am not good enough to be his friend, so be it, i will some how manage like i am now. I am just not going to be able to sleep for a while nor eat really. I am probably going to be real depressed. Not my normal self people just a warning. Although its over i know i know, every time the phone rings i go running to see who it is. Givin that hope, that leap of faith that it will be him to see how i am to see how i am copeing. So it's over. If you bothered to read all that . Thanks. I hope i can get over this soon. I highly doubt i will. I think i will have to cry myself to sleep. That is all. Let's see how these next few weeks are going to be going.
So this isn't a goodbye. It is just a simply see you around. We can still be friends...can't we?
Wow, That was a cool video. I want to do that. Who is with me? Now my quote stays true: "Never doubt that a small group of committed people can CHANGE THE WORLD Indeed, it is the only thing that has ever"
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